Writing Goals

Creative Writing:

No 2 sentences in a paragraph begin with the same word.

Essay Writing:
1. Have a clear thesis
2. Each paragraph has a clear topic sentence with example.
3. Don't repeat the same exact thing in the conclusion.



Friday, March 26, 2010

Kaylee.

Small little 2 bedroom cottage, with her 5 brothers and sisters. Growing up hasn’t been the easiest but the one thing she had to escape was music. When things got tough and no one else was on her side besides the almighty lord, she turned to what she knew best music. Her name was Kaylee Marie Peterson. She was a very talented and gifted girl. She sang like an angel, with a face to match. People would gather all around town just to see her sing in the local taverns and bars. The sad part was that she had all the talent and all the passion, man she loved music, a life without music was like no life at all. Yet what everyone is into now a days is money, they don’t care how passionate you are or how good you are they only want you for money, you’re like an ATM just waiting to run out of money so they can throw you out and say your no good anymore. It was also a shame because Kalyee never had that much money, she was always fighting to make end meet and pay rent when it was due. But she always found a way, her father died when she was 9 due to a major car accident. Now she lives with her mother, siblings and her “boyfriend” if that’s what you want to call him. A more proper name would be a freak that just follows her around like a puppy dog, they were on and off all the time considering he beats her, even in her own house for her brothers and sisters to see. She tried to always cover they evidence and make up excuses to calm everyone’s worries but being me, her best friend I knew exactly what was happening and the worst part is there was nothing I could do about it. I just had to watch her get beat everyday, new wounds for me to help her clean and new bones I watched her break, it was hard.
She always ran back to him for some reason though, I didn’t understand it this thing she calle “love”. I though love is when you are there for that person no matter what and you care for them, you always there for them and no matter what their flaws you learn to forget it and just love them for who they are. That’s what I thought love was but according to Kaylee she had a different picture, she always used to tell me “I can’t leave, I love him.” The thing that kills me though is everything she did was wrong he was always right and she was always wrong and rather she admitted she was wrong or not he would find some rhyme or reason to beating her. He hated her singing that she did and what she wanted to become all her hopes and dream were just jokes to him. She always used to get this sparkle in her eyes when she told me what she wanted to do she told me she wanted to go to New York and make it big. She was just a small town girl trying to make it big in the big city, the problem was no one had money to get her there. So she still hasn’t gone she’s just stuck in this washed up town of nothing for now. IT also doesn’t help when he was beating her every night I didn’t know what to do so I didn’t do anything. I watched this go on for 2 years, didn’t say a thing to no one cause she made me promise and cross my heart that I wouldn’t tell no body. This was hard for me but I wasn’t no liar I would keep my promise until the one day it cost me.
She was at home “sick” from school, but I already knew what was really going on Dominic ( her “boyfriend”) had beat her up the night before and he got her in the face a place she couldn’t cover up so she wasn’t going to show up to school the next week or so. This killed me because not only was he ruining her life at home, her dreams but no her education. It’s just so hard to watch your best friend go through something like this I was thinking about her all day and what I was going to do right after school when I got to her house, until the phone in Mr. Larson’s room rang. He talked to the person on the phone for a while and then sadly looked at me and told me he needed to talk to me. So we stepped outside. He was silent for a long while and then, he told me.
He told me that Kaylee was found at the end of the stairs, according to his story she fell. She was in the hospital and she is in critical condition. We went back in the classroom and I waited, waited for that stupid bell to ring it seemed like time itself was almost coming to a stop when suddenly the bell. I rushed to the hospital, ran up to kaylee’s room and saw her there all black and blue, burns all over her a cast on her left leg and to top it off wrap around her head where they sewed it back together because it got cracked open. When I saw this I broke down crying, I felt as if this was my fault sure I didn’t literally do it, but I could have said something to someone, and now it was to late, she only had a 25% chance of pulling through. The hardest part though was seeing her on the ventilator, this tube they shoved down her throat so that it could breath for her, this was hard to see because Kaylee has always been a really strong girl mentally and physically. Now I see her on a bed laying motionless with machines keeping her alive, I was in complete shock. How could I have let this happen to her.
Suddenly the doctor tapped my shoulder telling me it was okay to visit now, they could take the tubes out for maybe just 2 minutes but that’s it. So I rushed in to her room and hugged her very gently so I wouldn’t hurt her my face with streams of tears still coming down IK told her I was so sorry and how it was my fault I could have helped. Then she told me that I was the best friend she ever had and to not feel guilty because it wasn’t my fault, then she said I love you, and remember I will always be with you no matter what. Almost as if she knew, we gave each other one last hug, then suddenly I heard a loud flat beep. The machine monitoring her heartbeat had a straight blinking line across it, I didn’t know what to do or think so I screamed for help. All the nurses rushed in, they tried everything but Kaylee was gone, this time for good. How was I going to tell her family. Through all my anger and sadness though I could find a little happiness because for a split second it’s almost like I felt KAylee standing right next to me telling me everything was going to be alright, and not to worry. Almost as if she was right there watching over me like a guardian angel.